MY ORIGIN STORY
At some point in everyone’s childhood, we get asked, “What do you want to be when you grow up?” As a child, I noticed that all the other kids would quickly shout out answers, but I never knew what to say. I used to spend hours reading classic stories like “20,000 Leagues Under the Sea”, “Treasure Island”, “Robinson Crusoe”, and “The Three Musketeers”. I always dreamed of being a swashbuckling adventurer – right up until I discovered comic books. Those brightly colored pages with their larger than life characters introduced all kinds of new ideas into my wild imagination. What I wanted more than anything was to have superpowers, explore the universe, and save planets! So, when it came to that question, “What do you want to be when you grow up?” I was embarrassed and just shrugged.
One day, when I was about 15 years old, my life was changed forever. I was in a toy store in the mall doing some Christmas shopping with my mom and sister when I happened to come across this little spiral-bound book called “Draw the Marvel Comics Super Heroes”. It had a shiny picture of Spider-Man on the cover and came with its own set of markers. It looked like it was for little kids, but when I picked it up, and flipped through the pages, I was instantly mesmerized! I had never realized that people actually drew these characters (because I guess I thought they just magically appeared on the page…? Yeah, I don’t know what I was thinking, either…). I suddenly wanted this book so badly and would not put it down, but I was 15, didn’t have any money, and felt too embarrassed to ask my mom to buy it for me. So, I reluctantly put it back on the shelf (kind of tucking it behind some other books so nobody else would take it) and went home. I couldn’t stop thinking about it for weeks, and I thought I might go back another day to get it. I didn’t.
Well, unwrapping one of the presents on Christmas morning revealed that shiny little book - along with some additional markers, pencils, and a sketch book. To this day, I've never been more excited! I spent the rest of school vacation pouring through that book non-stop, and drawing like a maniac! A few months later, after I got my driver's license and a part-time job, I would buy comic books from either the grocery store next door to my job, or from the creepy, smelly comic shop in the next town over. I read them, of course, but they were more important to me as reference material. I would seek out images I thought looked cool and try my hardest to redraw them myself. In regular art class, I would recreate panels from the comics I liked at the time, and took a cartooning class so I could learn expressions and storytelling. I even started creating my own characters and stories. This was it! I had finally found what I wanted to be when I grew up – a comic artist!
Unfortunately, living in the real world has a way of crushing dreams. It was drilled into my head that financial wealth was the only path to success, and that I needed to study real-world things, not art. I ultimately dropped my dream and did what I believed society expected of me – I went to college, got a degree, and used that degree to get a decent paying job (eventually). After years of fighting through one adversity after another, I can now consider my lifestyle to be... somewhat comfortable, but it's always felt like something was missing. At the end of the day, I never felt satisfied. So, a few years ago I did some soul searching and asked myself, "What am I doing all of this for? Why do I continue to do work that makes me unhappy?"
Well, you know what does make me happy? Sketching superheroes while waiting for the dryer to finish at the laundromat; pouring through artist biographies and how-to books on various topics like anatomy, inking, perspective, cinematography, or whatever; and staying up until 3:00 AM looking up various references from older artists, practicing new poses, and coming up with my own ideas. When I draw, something inside changes. I become hyper-focused and completely tune out all the chaos of the world. When I'm finally done, I'm always satisfied ...at least until I see the flaws. But even then, I analyze those mistakes and try to do better on the next piece. These are the things I've always been doing since I was 15, so why am I not pursuing that which makes me happy?
In 2020, I made a conscious decision. Although I chose to stay on the old path temporarily, as a means to live and pay the bills, I also chose to walk a new path. For four years, I have silently pursued my dream - spending nearly all of my free time working tirelessly towards building my skills. At first, I didn't tell anybody, because it felt just like when I was a kid and they asked, "What do you want to be when you grow up?". Well, it took me a long time to realize what I already knew, and I can finally answer that question without any hesitation. I want to be a comic artist!
This website is just the beginning, and brings me one step closer to making my dream a reality! Thank you so much for being here and taking the time to read this - it really means a lot!
- Matt Nickola
